Rainy Nights
by Dippydora21534
Summary: Blaine is miserable, Kurt is gone. First attempt. Work in progress.
1. Chapter 1

_Summary: The distance between Kurt and Blaine begins to take its toll on Blaine, first chapter, bit angsty, please bear with me, first attempt...reviews/prompts encouraged._

_Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or anything associated with it. Nor do I own any music referred to in the text._

_The rain beat relentlessly against the dark windows of the car and the night stretched on seemingly forever as Blaine headed steadily down the highway lost in his own thoughts. Lights from passing cars illuminated his face momentarily; his usual mask now gone, if anyone was to see him now they would see a distracted and somewhat blank faced individual, there was no music, just the rain. Bitterness hung in the air so thickly you could almost taste it. Lost in his own thoughts he drove. _

_Blaine was lonely. Kurt was gone. Had been gone for three weeks. There were conversations and texts but Blaine missed the feeling of Kurt. The emotional attachment possibly more than the physical. Just to know he was there, could be there if he needed him. Just a physical presence in the room even if they weren't touching. He was floundering on his own. Kurt had promised to come home this weekend but flights had proved to be difficult to come by and Blaine had received a call earlier that day from a devastated Kurt confirming his most desperate thoughts. He would be alone again. _

_On he drove. The inevitable journey to his empty home seemingly taking an age. Distraction from the unavoidable had proved insufficient to bolster his thoughts. The friends he inherited from Kurt had been kind; he had been included in Sam and Arties evening of video games and pizza but his half hearted attempts to feign interest had proved too draining and he had slipped out with the excuse of the bad weather to cover his desolation._

_A faint buzz bought Blaine back from his thoughts, the rain still fell and the cars still passed and gradually he dragged himself back to the present. The glow of his mobile warmed him. The knowledge that someone, most likely Kurt was on the other end of that message seemed to ease him out of the nothingness he had slipped into._

_The phone lay on the passenger seat. The seat which should of held his boyfriend, the seat that for the Summer had been privy to the private lives of the couple, the times where they had nowhere to go but went anyway, the times where they laughed, sang and kissed. The times where they would sit in silence just to be together. Now the phone lay alone, glowing, offering the promise of softly spoken words of comfort. He glanced down but made no attempt to touch it. _

_Wandering through the dark house Blaine felt unusually calmed by the darkness. Like a blanket was draped around him in which he was allowed to feel the loneliness he was currently masked in. Making his way to his room he barely glanced around him. Nothing had changed since this morning when he had left, no-one had been there to change anything. No-one would be there when he awoke. He was alone both physically and emotionally and it was dark everywhere._

_The glow of the mobile continued to nudge at the corner of Blaine's consciousness as he changed his wet clothes and curled up under his duvet. The thought of hearing Kurt's voice should have been something that made him dizzy with anticipation but tonight his strength would be sucked from him if he listened to the soft voice of his partner without hope or possibility of contact. The solitude of his thoughts too great to break through. He slept. Protected by the darkness and with hope glowing silently from the top of his night stand. Tomorrow he would face his thoughts, tonight he would face his dreams and hope they would be kind. _

_Light inched its way across the room. Falling warmly across the tousled heap of bedding that was Blaine. It was early. The light was soft and the sounds of the neighbourhood were not yet heard. He stirred. The rain had moved on, leaving a freshness behind which was palpable. Easing open a bleary eye Blaine fumbled for his phone. Remembering the moments before he fell asleep. A message. A message from Kurt. A message he should have listened to last night but it had been too dark. Too dark for even Kurt to break through. _

_Clutching the phone he listened. The automation of the message service seeming cold and unfeeling as he waited for the sound he needed to hear and then there it was - Kurt. Why he didn't man up and listen last night would always remain a mystery even to him. Lost in his own desperation he had missed a soul warming gesture which may have saved him unnecessary heartache._

_Soft music, played and the voice of Kurt ghosted from the phone._

_I can't wait another day, until I call you. _

_You've only got my heart on a string, and everything a flutter. _

_But another lonely night, might take forever_

_We've only got each other to blame, it's all the same to me love,_

_Coz I know, what I feel, to be right._

_No more lonely nights, never be another, no more lonely nights._

_You're my guiding light, day or night I'm always there._

_And I won't go away until you tell me so; no I'll never go away._

_May I never miss the thrill, of being near you?_

_And if it takes a couple of years to turn your tears to laughter,_

_I will do what i feel to be right_

_No more lonely nights, no more lonely nights. _

_Soothing his mind the melody twined though Blaine's awareness, his heart and soul. _

_Kurt had called. Kurt loved him. Kurt cared. Darkness was lifting._


	2. Chapter 2 Contemplation

Chapter 2 - Contemplation

Kurt was desolate. He knew that Blaine was struggling; they both were but what could he do? It seemed a lifetime ago that they were together, holding each other, murmurings of love and whisperings of passion passing between them.

His heart ached from the conversation he had had earlier that day with Blaine. The moment he had told him that he couldn't get a flight was etched in his memory so deeply that it physically pained him to recall it. Blaine had been quiet, too quiet. Disappointment had been evident but there was something else in the silent moments that followed that made Kurt uneasy. Blaine was usually so accepting but the news that Kurt was not coming home had seemed to drain any kind of life from his voice.

Kurt new that Blaine was lonely. He had given up everything for Kurt when he moved schools and Kurt was painfully aware that Blaine was now left alone in a situation which was only just accepting of his life choices and with little in means of support. Kurt was no stranger to the loneliness; for several years he had suffered inside, outwardly strong, he had pushed his feelings down deep to survive, no-one knew and he would never tell but he had been desperately lonely. Even amongst friends the loneliness was never truly buried, it would surface when he was alone or vulnerable, thoughts of self doubt creeping to the surface, dark thoughts and feelings which he had since learned to manage if not totally contain.

Blaine had chosen to re-enter this place voluntarily to be with him, to bear the weight with him, a place which should have been confined to a bad memory, a place never to be revisited. Blaine however was now there, alone, and although he didn't make reference to his inner feelings, Kurt knew he was wary. Waiting for any sign that history could repeat itself. Blaine had sacrificed his security, emotional and physical to be with Kurt for his senior year, returning to public school, somewhere he was apprehensive, somewhere he shied away from, a spectre from his past. Kurt could never repay him for the gesture, although he would spend his life trying.

Guilt washed over Kurt in heady waves as he stared at the telephone. He replayed the conversation in his mind, wishing that he could have said something; anything differently but the fact remained the same. He could not get to Blaine and two hearts were slowly breaking.

Blaine had been quiet. The pause in conversation spoke louder than any words. The sadness in the silence was raw, nothing could be said to ease the pain so neither tried, they knew that to try would make a charade of the feelings they were trying desperately to contain. Each trying to spare the other the pain of their own hurt.

Regret was evident from both sides. Kurt had muttered apologies and murmured reassurances of love and sentiment down the line and although Blaine had done the same there was something empty and hollow in his delivery which haunted Kurt.

Tearing his gaze from the telephone Kurt retreated to the solitude of his room. He was alone in the apartment but he felt exposed. His feelings too near the surface to be bared to the world. He needed to be wrapped in his own thoughts; somewhere the world couldn't view him, somewhere safe. Lying wrapped in Blaine's old Dalton sweatshirt he listened to the sounds of the city outside his window. Traffic, loud conversations, the sound of car horns, the smells from numerous restaurants wafting through. In the half light of his room music echoed through the alleyway outside his window, the bar a block down must have had a band playing that night, the sound soothed him, allowed him to breathe deeper. Slowly he allowed his mind to release, to process every feeling he had born that day. Gradually he drifted away, away to a place he could gather his strength, a place he had been before, somewhere nothing could reach him. A place in his thoughts which was his alone.

Kurt cracked open an eye, light was glowing under his door. Rachel must be back. She had not disturbed him, for which he was grateful. It had been three weeks since they had moved into their apartment and both had realised and respected the others need for privacy. He moved to his window and closed it with a decisive click. Too many reminders of the distance between himself and Blaine had travelled through that window tonight and he wished more than ever to shut them out. The ease he had felt earlier that day whilst listening to the sounds was now gone, replaced by a harshness which bristled his senses. Back in Lima he would have heard the sound of the trees moving restlessly in the breeze, the sound of the neighbourhood going about its business. Here the sounds were stronger, harder edged, they beat with an energy which was not present in Lima, usually he relished this tempo but tonight he craved subtle whispers and gentle echo's of the past.

He glanced at the clock on his bedside table. He had only drifted for an hour or so but it had been long enough for darkness to envelope his room. Something about the dark was strangely comforting to Kurt. He felt safe in the dark.

Opening his telephone Kurt squinted at the sudden brightness. His first thought was to call Blaine. To speak to him again. To affirm the reassurances he had given him earlier that afternoon but he doubted that Blaine had heard many of them. Blaine had retreated within himself and nothing short of physical reassurance could pull him from his darkness. Closing the phone and slipping it into his pocket, Kurt stretched and groaned as tight muscles gradually released. Rolling his head from side to side to stretch out his neck he pondered his next move. Blaine had always expressed his emotions through music, whether it be a wordless emotive piece played on his guitar or during a full blown, no holds barred performance. Music touched him a way that simple words could not. Music reached into his soul, its messages settling comfortably within. Kurt decided this was the way he would reassure his boyfriend, the way in which he would convey his feelings. Now he just had to choose the right piece of music.


	3. Chapter 3 Deliberation

Chapter 3 – Deliberation

An empty pizza box sat on the floor next to the worn armchair that was currently occupied by one Rachel Berry. Her legs hung over the edge of the arm, one of her shoes gingerly dangling from her toes, swinging from side to side as she kept time to the sway of the music playing quietly from her docking station. Her other shoe had long since hit the floor, the rest of her was laid against several cushions of differing colours, her hair falling over the other armrest. This is where Kurt had found her upon finally exiting his room. He himself was now strewn across a large rug, his head resting on a cushion that Rachel had thrown his way. He looked to the ceiling, following the ministrations of a small spider that was keenly working on a web in the corner, something he would need to deal with before Rachel saw it but for now it proved to be a welcome distraction. One knee was bent, the other resting across it, his fingers gently tapping against his chin, his lips pouting slightly and a small frown creasing his forehead as he contemplated his Blaine situation.

Slowly Kurt looked towards Rachel, his hands dropping to his sides as he eased himself up onto his elbow to better see her. He could see that her eyes were closed but she was clearly still awake. They had been listening to Rachel's playlists for some time now, trying to find the perfect song to convey all of Kurt's feelings to Blaine. The room was lit mainly by the standard lamp next to Rachel's chair but there were also a few candles scattered around the room, some of them stuttering every now and again as they burned low on their wicks. Kurt considered Rachel for some time. She seemed relaxed and more than willing to help him in his search. In fact she seemed surprisingly composed; a rare state for Miss Berry, who was usually wound tighter than a violin string. He appreciated this calmer version tonight. He could not have dealt with the dramatic version of his best friend, not when he felt at a loss the way he did. As if knowing she was being watched, Rachel peered down at Kurt, raising her eyebrows as an invitation for him to share his thoughts.

Kurt fell back against the cushion rubbing his hands over his entire face and groaning with frustration as his hands swept through his hair leaving it dishevelled.

"What am I gonna do Rach?" he mumbled against his hands.

"He's so pissed at me right now. I need to call him and I've been through a dozen conversations in my head and I can't seem to get one that ends well", frustration evident in his voice.

Rachel's eyes stayed on him as he spoke even though he was no longer looking at her. He was monitoring the ceiling again; frustratingly the spider had clearly had a more productive evening than he had, it had managed to produce something intricate and strong, he had managed to wallow in self pity and disappointment. He narrowed his eyes at the delicate web as if personally affronted by the spider's persistence and success.

"Kurt?" Rachel's voice softly broke the quietness in the room.

"You know he loves you right?" "You know he's just disappointed, he'll be fine, don't worry so much, and just give him some space to deal".

There was no response from Kurt other than for him to sigh and place his hands on the floor either side of him and to drop his legs to the ground so that he was now laid out totally flat and defeated.

"He was so quiet Rach; you know that's not like him." Kurt spoke flatly, seeking her reassurance of his observation.

"I just need him to know how sorry I am that I can't make it back". "That it meant just as much to me as it did to him. You know his parents aren't home and the thought of him alone, wallowing, just about kills me". He glanced toward Rachel, finally meeting her gaze, which was filled with compassion and understanding.

Rachel knew how Kurt was feeling; she was dealing with a loss of her own but she also knew that he would figure things out without her having to offer much advice. All he needed was to talk, to spill out his thoughts and soon enough he would come up with the right course of action. She was happy to be his sounding board for the night. They had relied on each other so heavily over the past months, even before they had come to New York. It was unthinkable that she would have let him struggle alone.

Rachel smiled softly and hummed gently to the song now ghosting through the apartment. Kurt pulled himself from the floor, grabbing the pizza box as he went and headed toward the small kitchenette, he bumped Rachel playfully on the foot with the box as he passed, consequently relieving her toes of the remaining shoe which now joined its partner on the floor. Placing the box on the kitchen side, he filled a glass with water and leant back on the counter as he considered Rachel.

Her fingers trailed through her long hair and her eyes were closed as she lost herself in the track, her now naked feet still pulsing gently to the music.

He glanced toward the docking station, and tried to listen to the track which had captured Rachel's attention. It was not a track he knew well but he had heard it before. Pushing away from the counter he put down his glass with a soft click and padded towards the music. It was soft and gentle but filled with emotion and feeling. Something inside him stirred and a small smile crept into his eyes making them glitter in the semi darkness of the room.

Rachel cracked open an eye and watched him as he drifted towards the music, she continued to hum quietly along to the track. She saw the change in his face as the track washed over him and said nothing as he smiled gently at the dock and made his way silently towards his room; evidently he had found his song. A smile graced her lips as she closed her eyes and lost herself once again.


	4. Chapter 4 - Reunion Part 1

Author Note: Sorry for the delay, have been reading some old favourites ;) and you know life just gets busy sometimes. Being a Brit I have seen the clips on the internet regarding the break up and have decided to ignore! I like a happy ending.

Chapter 4: Reunion Part 1.

Kurt POV.

Kurt shifted in his seat. His legs were cramping and his neck was stiff from being at a funny angle whilst he slept. Not that sleep had come easily for him. The child in the seat behind had taken it upon himself to use Kurt's chair as his own personal kick board for most of the flight and for some reason his usual bitch glare had not worked. Giving up and shutting his eyes he had managed to grab an hour or so of exhausted sleep, thankfully missing the plastic airplane food which had been bought round whilst he dozed. It was dark outside now; he inwardly cursed that he had missed the sunset, something he usually loved to watch; the way the colours blended and bounced off the clouds was something that appealed to his romantic nature. Scrunching his face up he pressed it to the glass, considering the lights below. His stomach knotted. With nerves or excitement he couldn't quite decide. A swift kick to the back of his chair pulled him from his thoughts before he could dwell too deeply on them. If he didn't get off this plane soon, that kid was going to find himself locked in the bathroom. Running his hands down his face with a slight groan he attempted to stretch in the confines of his seat. Looking down at his clothes he winced as he saw the crumpled state of his button down and the decidedly shoddy look that his pants had taken on. He had boarded the flight straight from work so was not exactly dressed for comfortable travelling. On the other hand he had not wanted to reunite with this boyfriend without at least a nod to his usual fabulousness. This attire was unfortunately no longer covering any of the bases. It was too travel worn to be worthy of a romantic reunion and not remotely comfortable enough to be considered appropriate for travel. Deciding that there was very little he could do to rectify the situation he dug through his bag to find his tired paperback to distract himself. Resting his head against the window he attempted to lose himself for the remainder of the flight, knowing that what awaited him at the end was certainly worth the discomfort.

Blaine POV:

Thud. Thud. Thud. "For god's sake Blaine, will you stop tapping your bloody foot", sniped Sugar from the row in front. "You've done nothing but twitch for the last 30 minutes".

Blaine knew this was true. He hadn't been able to settle all day. He had been distracted in all of his classes; checking his phone at every opportunity. He'd been unable to eat at lunch, instead just sitting with the guys, beaming like a fruit loop and checking his phone like a crazy person.

Nobody could blame him though (except maybe Sugar, who was definitely annoyed now) the guys knew how badly he missed Kurt and now that he was coming back to visit there was no getting any sense from Blaine, so they'd left him to it. Smiling to each other every time they noticed his barely contained excitement and anticipation. He sat in the back row of the choir room now, foot bouncing up and down with an expression of someone desperate to be elsewhere. And therein lay his problem. He didn't want to be in school but Kurt's flight was still hours away so he needed the distraction. Unfortunately for him his distraction was proving irritating for a certain spoiled young lady.

"Sorry, Sugar", he mumbled politely as he crossed his leg over the other in an attempt to stop the bouncing. She sniffed and cast her look back to the front of the room.

Glancing to his left he gave Tina a small smile which she returned along with a roll of her eyes. Sugar could be blunt but she was harmless none the less. Glee club was almost over, there were really only waiting to be dismissed.

Leaving the room, Tina slipped her arm through Blaine's and squeezed it lightly. They had become closer over the weeks, Tina realising that Blaine needed someone and she too needing a friend.

"How are you holding up", she smiled.

"Honestly, Tina, I feel like I'm going to burst", grinned Blaine. "He'll be here this evening and I honest can't wait, it feels like forever since I saw him last".

"Oh, sweetheart", she smiled, clutching his arm stronger. "Are you nervous? You didn't eat anything at lunch and you've barely said two words to any of us today".

"Yeah, I'm fine. Its just alot you know. It's been a while now and he's coming back, and I'm nervous and excited and I can't concentrate and, and, and..."

"Okay, okay, calm down", laughed Tina. "He's on his way right? You've just got to keep calm until he's back or you're going to go crazy, and you know Kurt doesn't do crazy right".

"Yeah, right", smiled Blaine.

Tina unlocked her combination and placed her books in her locker. Taking out a bag of cookies and handing them to Blaine.

"Here", she said. "Eat these. We can't have you passing out on the guy the minute you see him now can we? What sort of impression would that be now huh?"

"Tina, what can I say, you are wonderful", sighed Blaine taking a cookie from the pack and shoving it straight into his mouth, all usual manners out of the window. The rest of the cookies were devoured as they made their way to the parking lot as Blaine suddenly realised just how hungry he actually was and cursing himself just a little for not eating sooner as surely this had added to his distraction. Sam was leaning against his beaten up truck, face turned to the sun whilst he waiting for Blaine. He would be taking him to Burt's to pick up Kurt's navigator. Who knew how much luggage Kurt would be bringing with him; even if it was only for a few days and Blaine's car was not designed for luggage, so it had been decided to err on the side of caution and take the biggest car available. Kurt was unaware of this and probably wouldn't see the funny side but Blaine was fairly confident that given the circumstances and a little coercion that he could placate him easily.

Kissing Tina on the cheek Blaine walked toward Sam, fist bumping once he was close enough.

"Hey man, ready to go get your guy", smiled Sam.

"Absolutely", chimed Blaine.


End file.
